Video Game Therapy
Today Dr Sane is visited by Mario's first video game love, Pauline. Let us listen in as she pours her heart out to Dr N. Sane
Pauline - Doctor, will I ever get over him?
Dr Sane - Who are we referring to?
Pauline - Why my true love, Mario.
Dr Sane - Do you speak of Mario from the Donkey Kong and Super Mario games?
Pauline - Yes, the man who tore my heart out and ripped it to shreds.
Dr Sane - I see. And why do you think Mario tore out your heart and ripped it to shreds?
Pauline - Because he dumped me for her.
Dr Sane - And who is the woman he dumped you for?
Pauline - That man stealing tramp, Princess Peach.
Dr Sane - Interesting. And why do you think he did this?
Pauline - Because he wants to be a prince. I doubt she really is a princess. Who ever heard of the Mushroom Kingdom? Sounds like some hippie commune to me.
Dr Sane - Tell me about your relationship with Mario?
Pauline - In the first Donkey Kong game, he had to rescue me from Donkey Kong. I figured any man who would risk life and limb to save me from a gigantic ape was the man of my dreams.
Dr Sane - And what happened after he saved you?
Pauline - At first it was great, we were so in love. Then he got itchy feet. He needed excitement in his life. Before I knew it he was messing with Donkey Kong again. Then he was hanging out with his good for nothing brother, Luigi. They would go away for days at a time. When he came back, he stunk. I told him that I was sick of him disappearing and told him to choose between me and his brother. That was the last I heard of him.
Dr Sane - And how does Princess Peach fit into this?
Pauline - It was soon after he left that I heard he was shacking up with that so called princess. I know they were together all the time and he was just waiting for us to break up to make it official.
Dr Sane - What makes you think that?
Pauline - His alibis were weak. He told me that he was battling creatures in the sewers with his brother, but I know he was using the sewer smell to hide the perfume smell of Princess Peach. I was not born yesterday, I know when a man is trying to hide something.
Dr Sane - This is going to take some time for us to work this out. Please make an appointment with my secretary and I will see you in a week.
(This is actually the second Pauline Video Game Therapy I have done. I did one a few years ago for Retrogaming Times Monthly, a newsletter that continued after I stopped my newsletter. If you want to read the original Pauline one, here is the link http://my.stratos.net/%7Ehewston95/RTM04/RTM04.html#Video_Game_Therapy ).
Arcade After Dark © Tom Zjaba
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